Trump and Pence are Goofus and Gallant

 

 Donald Trump and Mike Pence spawns a lot of jokes about the libertine President and his uptight, rather prudish Vice President.  For those of us old enough to remember Bill Clinton, it struck a chord.  A lot of them sounded very much like jokes about Bill Clinton and Al Gore.*

But Trump and Pence go well beyond Clinton and Gore.  But with the latest story about how Pence meticulously catalogued the government documents in his possession and turned them over the proper authorities, suddenly I realized who Trump and Pence are. They are Goofus and Gallant.  For anyone (including me) who is not old enough to remember Goofus and Gallant, they were apparently a cartoon giving lessons to children.  Goofus showed children what not to do; Gallant showed children what to do.  And suddenly Trump and Pence made a lot more sense.

Goofus runs off with random government documents, including some marked "Top Secret."  Gallant meticulously catalogues his documents and hands them over the the proper authorities.

Goofus gets two scoops of vanilla ice cream with his chocolate pie when everyone else just gets one.  Gallant has a plate of fruit for dessert.

Goofus discards his wives as soon as their beauty starts to fade.  Gallant has been married to the same woman for 37 years. Goofus grabs women by the pussy.  Gallant avoids any potentially compromising situation with any woman.

Goofus responds to a fire in an iconic cathedral with unsolicited advice that fire fighters have already rejected as impractical. Gallant responds with reverence and compassion.

And, of course, Goofus responds to losing an election by egging on a mob baying for Gallant's blood.  Gallant won't let even a howling mob keep him from his constitutional duty.

But here is the thing.  The comparison may be apt in more ways than one because, let's face it.  Everyone hates Gallant.**  He's just too much of a goody-goody.  Any one good thing that he does will no doubt meet with approval.  But being constantly so good is hard to read as other than a rebuke to the rest of us for not living up to Gallant's standards.

And that, of course, is the secret to Trump's appeal.  He gives us permission to be Goofus.  In fact, he celebrates our inner Goofus as "authenticity" and dismisses Gallant as mere snobbery.  And let's face it.  Everyone would rather be Goofus than Gallant. We just don't want everyone else to be Goofus.

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*Example: When the impeachment report came out detailing everything Bill Clinton did that met the legal description of sex used at his deposition, the joke was that Tripper Gore would have to explain half of that stuff to Al.  When rumors of the peepee tape came out, someone joked that a very uncomfortable staffer is now explaining to Mike Pence what a "golden shower" is.

**When I searched for imagines of Goofus and Gallant, at least half were spoofs of some kind.